Grandma's Memorial Service

My grandma passed away Friday, October 19th.

She was diagnosed with cancer just after Jennifer got married in December, 2009 at the age of 69.

She had stage 4, so the prognosis wasn't good.  We were able to get together with all of our family lots of times in 2010 and lots since then- which wasn't much of a change, we all get together a lot.

She had been doing fine- at least that's how it seemed.  She came to all of the events- blessings, baptisms, weddings, graduations, holidays.  She would have to take naps, but was mentally all there and a part of everything as always.

In June we got to see her in southern California for my cousins' graduations.  She was very sick most of the time, but was able to come out for the ceremony.  For Easter I went to Oregon with the kids (that trip when Zach had the major allergic reaction to something in the air) and we were able to spend a lot of time with Grandma and Grandpa.  Elizabeth would go wake Grandma up each morning (not really, she was already up and checking her stocks on her iPad) and talk and talk to her.  Zach would come up too and ask lots of questions.  It was nice to be able to see her again in June, and hard to say goodbye.  I knew that would be the last time I would see her alive on this earth, and it was tough.

John, Jared, and I left Napa early Saturday morning and headed for the airport.  My Uncle Matt and Grant and Riley had a layover in Oakland, so we saw them at the gate.  We drove to Grandma's house with Jennifer and Spencer through the rain.  After getting ready, we headed for the church down the street.  On the way we passed the street where she used to live...so the house I remember her most.

The service was wonderful.  I was the chorister, and on the first song I was concentrating so hard on not crying that I kept messing up.  I held it together a little better for the last song.  My dad read some words she had written, my mom and Aunt Leslie spoke, as well as her one brother, Uncle Dick who just returned from a mission in Africa with his wife in September.  The grandchildren sang, and there was a short slideshow.  We all lost it during that.

It is still very strange to me that she isn't here physically.  She has always been a strong presence in my life.  There is the grandma I remember who is loud and laughs a lot and yells 'RO-GER!' to grandpa and who thinks I'm funny and brilliant and beautiful.  Then there is the quieter grandma of the last couple of years (her cancer and surgery affected her voice) who was still there, just not quite the same.  More fragile.  Then there is the grandma of the last month who suffered and struggled and needed to go to the next life.  At the funeral I could only picture/hear in my head the Grandma I grew up with.

John, Jared and I went home Sunday morning after being in Portland for about 22 hours.  It rained the whole time!  We made it back to California and Roma brought the other kids home after church.  Some of the rest of the family went to Utah then drove up to Idaho to bury grandma.  They had a service in Montpelier and she was buried in Paris.  There were even more grandchildren there since the ones in Utah and all the college/married grandkids in Utah/Idaho were able to go.

I'm so glad we were able to go out for the quick trip and am anxious to get together with everyone in a couple of weeks for Thanksgiving.